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Letters to Payton: Month 12

Dear Payton,

A whole year! Can you believe it? We have been together for 12 whole months. 12 months filled with the happiest moments of my life. As I sit and write this, I reflect back on August 5th of just last year and how I felt. When your Dad and I got the call that you had been born, we ran around like crazy people trying to hurry and pack a suit case and feeling more joy than we ever thought possible. I remember literally jumping up and down screaming because I was so happy that you had made it and you were safe and healthy. I remember everything just being a blur because I could hardly think straight – I was THAT excited. Before we left the house to make the drive to come and meet you, our sweet baby boy, we fell to our knees to thank our Father in Heaven for the most incredible gift he had blessed us with --- You.I don’t remember much from that prayer, but I do remember getting the feeling that this day would change my life forever.

The drive to come and get you felt like eternity. I wanted nothing more than to hold you in my arms and let you know how much I loved you and how much you were meant for our family. When we finally made it to the hospital, I was shaking. I was so excited to see you, smell you and feel your soft skin on mine. When the nurse finally rolled you in, tears were streaming down both my cheeks as well as your Dad. We were overcome with a pure and unconditional love for you. We felt right off the bat that you were special. You had a purpose on this earth and you were meant to be with us. I held you in my arms and your Dad held me in his and we just cried tears of joy. You didn’t even seem to mind.

Payton, you have taught me so much in this past year. There have been some challenges in our family that sometimes would get me very frustrated and down, and then you would look at me with your huge, beautiful, blue eyes, and I would just melt. All my fears and anxiety would go away because you and your father were all that mattered.

You are a walking miracle. There were many days before you came that I didn’t know if I would ever be a mother. I prayed so hard for that gift, and you are a true testament that God hears and answers prayers and that He has a plan for each and every one of us.

You are such a busy little boy. You have an energy that exceeds any little human I have ever known. You love to clap. You love to wave at people. You love to walk with me holding my hand. You love it when your Dad walks in after working all day. You hurry to him as fast as you can so he can pick you up and hug you. You love to come watch me cook dinner and talk to me. So many things that you love to do that remind me just how special you are and how blessed I am to be your Mother.

Thank you Payton. Thank you for the BEST year of my life. There are not many things I am sure of --But I am 100% sure that I was meant for you and you were meant for me. You are a perfect match for our family. Today we not only celebrate your birth, but we celebrate one of the best days of our lives.

Happy Birthday Baby Boy! I cannot wait to see what happens next. We love you so much.




Letters to Payton: Month 11

Dear Payton,

I can hardly believe you are 11 months old. That just seems so old to me. You do not act like a baby much anymore; you pass more as a toddler now. You have learned so many new tricks this month and you are trying really hard to converse with us more and more. Sometimes in your own language, which is super cute.

This month has been a busy one for you. You are taking steps here and there, but you are a master crawler and still prefer it over walking. This is totally OK by me because you are hard enough to keep up with as it is. You have done some major teething this month and have about 4 teeth coming in, so there have been some hard days where you just want Mom to hold you and watch Baby Einstein. I love the cuddles though, as it is a rare occasion with you. You are usually just too busy too fit cuddling with Mom in your schedule.
You love to play. We play chase, we play with your blocks (mostly we build them and you knock them down) and you LOVE balls. You love to push your bouncy balls around the house and just laugh and laugh at it. Sometimes I wish I could read your mind cause you will find things so funny and I have no idea why. But of course, it always makes me laugh too.

The biggest discovery you have had this month is your love of music. If there is a song playing, you are dancing. You love to wave your chubby little arms and move your legs. It melts me every single time and I will stop whatever I am doing to watch you dance.
I have said it before, and I will say it again. You have made your Dad and I the happiest we have ever been Payton. Life would not be complete without you in our family. 11 months later, and I still get choked up thinking about how much of a miracle you are to our family. I will never ever take you for granted and I will cherish every minute I have with you. I am so excited to celebrate your birthday in a few weeks with close friends and family. You have been such a blessing to all you meet. We love you little man!