I got an email today from a girl I knew back in high school and she said I really needed to start having kids soon and that the prophet discourages people waiting on having kids, even if it is for school purposes. What the?!?
.... Lets just say I wanted to scream!
This whole experience of trying to have a baby has been one of the biggest eye openers for me ever. Before I was married, I remember thinking "I wonder why they haven't had kids yet"... and sometimes I would even pass judgment on them thinking, oh it's because they want materialistic things or want fancy careers. Little did I know that I would be dealing with infertility.
Lesson learned.
I have a best friend who is pregnant with her third child. Her husband just looks at her and she gets pregnant, ha ha. And I love her kids-- she named her first one after me, so obviously I have no hard feelings against her for being SO stinkin' fertile.
But I do have a problem with people who like to pick other people apart.
After going through this whole experience, I have personally learned that you NEVER know what is going on in that person's life. You never know what has lead them to what they may or may not be doing.
This experience has taught me to show compassion and to just do all I can to support those I love. I was on the phone with my Mom last night and she said something that hit me hard about this trial Geoff and I are going through and I think it applies to any trial for anyone. She said "Life is unfair, God is NEVER unfair. He just allows unfair things happen to refine his children". I liked that and it gave me peace that someday I will be blessed for enduring these unfair moments in my life.
3 days ago
17 comments:
Hey ! Life is unfair! Trials can be so overwhelming. I'm going through one of my own - its sad and hard! (its not the having childern) ...but I can relate to the "life is not fair" ... That email is bizzard! I'm sorry! JL
some people...
That sucks!! I too have learned you never know what other people are going through. Outside appearances and smiles can be deceiving. We will continue to pray for you guys!! Hang in there.
thanks for sharing what your mom said. that is very true!
and when i read the first part of this post my mouth just dropped. i'm surprised by some of the things people think they have a right to pry into. especially THAT! hang in there cous.
Yeah dude, I'm so sorry for the stupidity you had to put up with. I'm glad you can make it through those horrible words.
Cami, you are AMAZING! Life is unfair and it is sad that people say the things they do and automatically pass judgment. I love reading your blog and you are such a great example to me! Love what your mom said too! I'm glad that you have such a great mom and a wonderful hubby to help you through these tough times!
I'll egg her house with you, if you want. :)
Seriously, though, I think you guys are great. The end.
For the love! Who does that? Its one thing to wonder but to go preaching, especially with no understanding of the situation--no matter what the circumstance its none of their business. Reading that made me mad someone would be so pig-headed. If you need to vent more, give me a call and I will add to the venting with my own thoughts on this individual :)
I hope you're feeling better. Love the quote you shared. I'll have to write that one down.
(Sampson) I've known you for a while...we were never really tight like hanging out every weekend, but I felt like I could call you my friend. And of what I knew and know about you now is YOU'RE AWESOME!! Blows like that hurt. Some people just don't get it (my husband says that will be the title of his book). But, like always, you're taking the higher road...and frankly, the higher road sucks sometimes. Keep your chin up. As you already know, all of this is happening for a reason (though I'm sure you're sick of hearing that excuse!) You're mom is a very wise person...I'd say she's the one to keep listening to! Love ya!
ahhh Cami, I'm sorry. That's horrible.
You are a wonderful person and a wonderful mother- already looking out so hard for your children that WILL come to you.
Thanks for sharing your experiences with such candor and honesty.
Sending you my love!
I can't agree with you more. Being someone who had to wait a year and half to get pregnant as well as miscarry, I understand the frustration. I'll admit I judged people too. Not only do you have to deal with people making their catty comments, but you have to watch everyone get pregnant before you. I found comfort knowing I was doing what was right and got to enjoy being alone with my husband a while longer without distraction. Hang in there!
I'm sorry you had to hear that. Nobody deserves to hear that. You are so strong and you give me such hope. Seriously, I look up to you.
Our best friends in our ward have been married for eight years and have been trying for six. They just found out a birth mom just picked them and will have a brand new girl in two weeks! It has been such a up and down for both of them... BUT they are an amazing couple! They have the best relationship. They are great friends to those around them (even though their friends have had kids). Now they are so excited to have this new little one come into their lives and everyone around them is cheering!
Cami... blessings are ahead for you! Heavenly Father has an amazing plan for you!
I love what you said about how we shouldn't judge people. Because I also believe that we never know why people do what they do, unless they were to look straight at us and tell us. There are just so many things that effect everything. You just never know! I'm sorry about that email. I'm glad you have such a great support system though. There are a lot of people who love you. =)
So, until your blog it never occurred to me that having a baby could be hard, but since then I've started asking people I know who have kids about this sort of stuff and I generally get from people that it took them over a year of trying and frequently it's over two or three years of trying plus going to clinics. Hang in there.
Why would anyone ever say something to anyone like that? That is not very Christ-like to say something like that.
The Trial you are facing is very hard but you are so strong that it will be a short time and it will be your turn to enter into parenthood.
You are so amazing and I love you!
Ditto to what you said. I'm sorry she did that! No one has really said anything like that to me, but sometimes I'm sure they're thinking it...
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